calikitty-13:

twospookywhiskey:

bleachdalilah:

thtwhitegurrl:

slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?

PLEASE EXPLAIN

EHEHEH

No one explain

gunpowderandspark:

According to the song Seasons of Love from RENT, there are 525,600 minutes a year.

One line later, there are “525,000 Moments so dear”.

So, doing the math, we can glean that there are 600 moments which aren’t so dear.

And I think I just used one of them by walking in on my boss who forgot to lock the bathroom stall.


pandarwar:

susemoji:

where do these white dads come from

mikepagebrand

(Source: vinebox)


fatherlordzukoz:

simple-molly:

I can’t stop replaying this over and over and laughing

I wish we got to know that mushroom more because….

maybe it’s f r i e n d l y

  • *watches a movie*
  • *sees a dog*
  • me: if something happens to that dog I sWEAR TO GOD

boobsandbooks:

noonafeels:

OH MY I JUST SNORTED MY MILK.

GO TO A DOCTOR IMMEDIATELY 

(Source: sandandglass)


(Source: ebilflindas)